How To Grow your own Herbs - Part 2

Hey! How's that horticulture going? Better, but you'd still welcome some more practical tips? I knew it.

It's all very well to say "don't stress" and "choose wisely," but then what? Sooner or later you'll have to get down to business, plunge your hands into the soil, and... go back on the Internet looking for answers for all those new questions you now have.

But don't worry, 'cause I'm here for you.

Kitchen Witchcraft's Horticulture Tips and Tricks

1. Use DIY conservatories

One of life's great tragedies is that not everyone can have a beautiful and slightly spooky Kew-Gardens-Grade walk-in conservatory (greenhouse) in art nouveau style. Some of us have to make do with other things. These other things may not be as pretty or impressive, but they get the job done and they will be a tremendous help to you, especially if you live in slightly colder climes.

These three types of DIY conservatory I've used are all effective, work for small spaces including balconies and windowsills, and they come with bonus upcycling.

  Old windows 

My mother's house got new windows last year (finally!) and instead of throwing the old ones out, we used them to make this small plant nursery thing. It works great. All you have to do is find a spot with a sensible amount of sun, and secure the windows so they don't move. Then cover the sides (in our case, with a sturdy plastic sheet, but a bit of a board or old tiles or whatever work just as well). The point of a conservatory is to keep warm inside so you can't leave a gaping hole in there.

  Plastic containers 

A really simple and effective way of helping your seeds out is to simply get a container of transparent, colourless plastic, and upturn it onto a flowerpot. That's it. Instant conservatory. You only have to remember to match the size and shape of the thing to your pots, because any gaps will let the heat out and defeat the purpose. And when too much moisture collects on the inside, you have to wipe it off.

  Plastic bottles

This is a way to have an individual mini-conservatory for a single plant. It's a good idea when you've brought it from a nursery, planted it in one of your pots, and don't want the transition to be too harsh for it. You simply take a transparent, colourless bottle of a desired diameter and cut it to the desired height. Then you pop it down onto the plant, taking care not to tear off anything. The advantage of this system is that you can open/close the cap to let moisture evaporate easier on hot days, or even to water the plant. This is also a great way to apply pest control sprays only on the one plant that needs it, and prevent the pests from spreading out, or at least makes it more difficult. Sort of a quarantine chamber.

Note: your home conservatories don't have to be DIY. If you feel like it, go ahead and buy the adorable things available at shops. Whatever you prefer.

2. Don't sneer at commercial fertilisers and treatments

Homemade stuff is great, but not all of us have the time and the knowledge to make it right. Or the facilities. Concocting the organic pest control spray from fermented nettle leaves will not be easy if you rent out a room from a cranky landlord. Plus, various plants do have various needs and you may be able to save yourself a big headache if you just buy a dedicated fertiliser that was composed for the specific plant and its needs.

However, when using commercial fertilisers:

• always buy a small batch first and see how the plants respond to it 
• read up on whether or not it can be used for edible plants 
• for aromatic herbs especially, choose dedicated fertilisers "for herbs." It sounds like a silly cash grab, but other such substances can and did change the taste of my herbs, whereas a dedicated one didn't. 

3. Provide Drainage

Good drainage is when the excess water from your plant can flow out of the soil and elsewhere, to evaporate and/or be drank up by the plant later, when it's done with what's in the soil. Only plants native to swamps and tropics handle soggy soil and too much water well - for the rest of them, their roots will rot and the plant will wither and die.

The best way to provide drainage is to plant the herbs in something that has holes in the bottom, and put that in another receptacle that will catch the water as it flows out. This can be a saucer, or a tray, or another, bigger pot. Whatever you prefer. Personally, I plant mine in simple plastic containers with holes, and put those in pretty pots and old tea kettles and vases and whatever tickles my fancy.

If you absolutely cannot have holes in the bottom for whatever reason, then start the planting by making a thick layer (at least 3-4 cm) of gravel, expanded clay or similar material at the bottom of the pot. Put the soil and the plant on top of that. Don't use sand for the purpose because it's too fine.

4. Water From Below

Except for plants that explicitly like being doused in water or sprayed, most of them prefer to draw the water from the ground up. Like they do naturally. It's much better to supply your plants with water from underneath, so that roots are forced to burrow for it and can expand and keep the plant upright. If your plant always gets its water from the surface, all the roots will be near the surface too.

This is easily done when you have holes in your pots, as per #3. You just pour the water onto your saucer or into the outer pot and are done with it.

In other cases, you may have to dig a small hole somewhere to the side of the pot so that the water flows into it. You can also stick a "pipe" into the soil (a bit cut off from a garden hose, for instance) and pour the water into it, let it seep into the soil that way. Not all plants will like that, though - for some, this can make the soil too cold for their roots, for instance.

5. Mess about with your plants

It's tempting, especially for people who flirt with the whole Mother-Nature Druidry Cottage Herbalism thing (and that's certainly me and probably some of you, too) to leave the plants to their devices and let them do their thing.

And for many plants, this can be totally OK, but every once in a while you'll have those that do need to be taken care of. If you see leaves are bitten and disappear at an alarming rate, it's no use hoping the plant can deal with it. You need to deal with the caterpillars for it. If you see leaves with signs of sickness on them, best tear them off and throw them away.

Some of the more typical things you may want to do for your plant:

  Prop it up

It may be a creeping vine in need of a frame to climb, or an overlong, thin stem that needs support. So give it some. You can buy frames and poles (usually of bamboo) in gardening stores, or you can use sturdy sticks you can find, or those thin bamboo skewers for the small pots. Avoid metal things because they may rust in the soil and the plant may not like it.

When providing your potted plant with a pole, always stick the thing right next to the pot edge. It may seem a better idea to have it right next to the plant, but then you risk damaging roots. And if it's right by the edge then it's better stabilised.

  Patch it up

Sometimes, stems break, and then there's nothing for it but to put it in water and hope it will take root. But sometimes they only break a bit, hanging limply but with the inner fibers intact. In these cases, it may be worth it to use a bit of tape to patch it up, adhesive-bandage style, keeping it together. This happens quite a lot with my ampelopsis, and I usually wrap it with a bit of paper tape, putting a small bit of tissue over the tear just so the glue doesn't get into it.

  Cut it up

It may break your heart to cut bits off of a plant that is doing its best to grow, but sometimes this may be a good thing. Maybe a particular branch is too heavy, and the stem is sagging under its weight. Maybe you want it to branch out to the sides, too. Maybe a part of it is ill.

If you need to cut up your plants, try to use as sharp a knife as possible so that you don't leave a jagged, haggard wound.

🌱🌱🌱

Ookay, you may possibly know more than you wanted to now. Get planting!

How to Grow your own Herbs (Successfully!)

It's spring in full swing here, and that means gardening season is officially open. Right now would be the time to really bustle around your plants if you want them to be in good shape for the new cycle.

But what if you have no idea what you're actually doing?

I get so, so many questions about this. Questions ranging from "how do I grow things" (which is on par with, I dunno, "how do I walk?") to... oh I don't even know. All sorts of them.

So here it is: 

The absolute basic Grow Your Own Herbs 101

(looking for more practical tips? Check out Part 2 of this post!)

Most kitchen witchcraft practitioners want to grow their own herbs, and that's also what I do, so that's what I'll be writing about, but most of this is applicable to basically any kind of plant.

1. Choose the plant to suit conditions (not the other way around)

Various plants need various conditions, because they grow naturally in various environments. But most of us can't easily change, say, the way the sun shines on our garden / windowsill. So the very first thing you need to do if you want to grow your own herbs successfully is to look at what you have, and check what can work with it. If you have a lot of sun and dry soil, rosemary will like you. If you only have shallow pots, though, thyme will be a better choice because it doesn't root deep. If you live in a basement and have no sun, the aromatic spicy ones won't really be happy. Choose wisely, it will pay off.

2. Don't be scared of specialised knowledge

There are many gardening sites available, and a lot of them are very daunting, with their insistence on super-pro equipment ("don't even leave house without your soil acidity measuring tool!") or labour-intensiveness ("dig up the whole bed three feet down and completely replace the whole soil with a mixture of horse manure and mulch"). Reading all that seems quite pointless, but among that stuff you will find important information. Heather really does need acidic soil and if you don't know that, then kiss it goodbye.

3. Don't overdo

Especially when your conditions are not ideal, you may be tempted to overdo things. "I don't have enough sun, so I will double the water, it's the least I can do!" - that's how I was when I started out with these things. It didn't end well.
Do what the plant needs, and let it try to cope with inevitable deficits in its own way. If you followed #1 and chose it well, it should do fine.

4. Remember that gardening is a messy, nitpicky job

People get discouraged because not many things in horticulture can just be done once and forgotten about. You have to keep on watering those plants, looking out for caterpillars, removing the dead stems and sick leaves.
You will also have to deal with the various ugly aspects of the job. Homemade, organic pest control really is organic, also when it comes to the smell.

5. Don't stress

Things are slow in the plant world, slow and strange. You may do everything right, and yet have no results, you may get impatient thrice already before anything happens with those seeds you planted. I've had some seeds that did nothing for two seasons and sprouted on the third spring. I had some cherished wild rose fruit that I transported from one end of the country to the other in a special box, just to grow the plant, and nothing doing. These things happen and you just take them in stride.

More practical tips in Part 2 of this post!

Kitchen Witchcraft on a Budget

I was asked for advice on Tumblr as to how do some kitchen witchcraft on a tighter budget, and I've decided to post it here as well. Maybe it will come in handy to someone?

Kitchen Witchcraft, in its essence, is witchcraft on a budget. It’s a very frugal, simple practice that incorporates spiritual meaning into everyday chores, and if you’re in need of economising, I’d say that’s the best way.

1. Try food spells. You need to eat anyway, right? And “normal” spices are the core ingredients of kitchen witchcraft in any case. So instead of getting all ceremonial at it with offering dishes and five colours of candle, make a soup. Visualise your intentions, think of what you want to achieve and draw your way (or draw away) - it’s a whole ritual ready and waiting, fire, knives, mortars. Careful cooking is especially useful to people on tight budgets, because not only does sensible home cooking save you money, it can be a meditative activity that can reduce your stress and anxiety - and those are common where money is tight. Just don’t rush it, don’t do it while your mind is somewhere else. Think of it as your sacred moment.
2. When doing food spells, research the right spices for the purpose (tons of information online), but also adapt to your own needs. Remember, this is a personal practice. It’s about you. Someone might say you absolutely need white quartz or saffron or whatever, but they’re not the highest authority on what you need; you are. (For instance, many American witches use alfalfa as a prosperity-drawing ingredient. For me, that doesn’t work, because in my country, it was what the poorest people fed the poorest livestock - rabbits, goats - to survive. It’s a completely different image and energy. What works for one person doesn't necessarily work for another.)
3. Feature protective magic in your cleaning chores. The two are almost one and the same anyway - no amount of protective sigils and cleansing incenses will make you feel better if you live in filth, anyway. And people on a budget (of which I definitely am one) need all the health and positive energy we can get, while not always having time for complicated rituals. Or money for expensive cleaning agents. So I like to bring the two together, making my own cleaning agent of baking soda and white vinegar, and clean house with it (floors - not wood! - bath, sinks etc). It makes me feel much more in control of my own space, and saves quite a bit of money.
4. Learn a bit about herbs. They’re not really expensive, especially the popular ones, and they can be very useful in both magic and household. Use a herbal mixture in baths, or to clean delicate surfaces (wood, wood laminate, windows…), or as infusions. Making your own tea mixes, spice mixes, oil infusions - it all adds up, and it all doubles as your herbal talismans, witch bottles etc.

Cheese

'Cheese is good. Cheese is alive'.
- Granny Weatherwax, in The Wee Free Men

There might be something more to life than eating cheese and drinking wine, but quite frankly, there isn't much of it.
Fame evaporates and so do lovers (metaphorically speaking, I hope), but a good cheese will wait in the fridge faithfully, intent only on being eaten*. It may not be as glamorous and exciting as some exotic fruit, or as showy as caviare or some fancy dessert. But it's damn tasty, that's for sure.
Right at the start of this little blogging folly of mine, I promised to explore the cheese subject in-depth. A good opportunity has just presented itself - my love of cheese is well-known to those close to me, so they've been presenting me with many dairy delicacies lately. It's not every day You find five different kinds of cheese at home, so I couldn't let this pass unnoticed.

Cheese is one of the oldest foods in the world - older than bread, surely, because milk-giving animals have been domesticated before humans learned to grow crops. Nothing conclusive is known about the exact place of its origin, but it seems logical that cheese originated more or less everywhere: all humans need to eat and are likely to experiment widely in that field, and milk was available pretty much to every ethnic group out there.  So if You're feeling like giving Your respects to the ancestors, cheese is a good bet.

There are thousands of types and varieties of cheese, since all those Peoples who got the idea have been working on it ever since. They can be classed by many different criteria, such as type of milk used (cow, sheep, goat etc.), texture or type of fabrication process and so on. Since all this is not really that useful and can be read elsewhere, I will stick to my own examples. As seen on the picture, we have:

The blue vein

Made using a special variety of mould, these cheeses have a very characteristic apparition and a peculiar, strong taste. Can be made from any milk, but the most famous one, roquefort, is only allowed to bear the name if made from sheep milk and in the caves near Roquefort-sur-Soulzon.
When dealing with those, it's important to remember that they are, for all intents and purposes, covered with mould. Do not wrap them up with other cheeses, even other "mouldy" ones. It's also a good idea to wash the knife before using it on something else, unless You do want to spread the mould everywhere.
Strong, dry red wine is necessary - anything weaker will lose to the taste of cheese immediately. Incidentally, the "vein" can be anything from blue to green to red to even purple at times.

The 'standard' semi-soft

There's actually nothing standard about them, seeing as the category is only semi-valid by itself, but those cheeses are the most popular around the western world - Gouda, Edam or Maasdamer, those are the cheeses that You will put on a sandwich most often. They can vary greatly in tastes and shapes, and their biggest advantage is being as close to 'universal' cheese as possible: they can be sliced for toast, grated for pizza or pastas and cut in large bits for fried cheese cutlets.
These cheeses keep well and start spoiling from the surface, so the places in question can be cut off without losing the rest. Just remember not to leave them unwrapped as they dry out and become unusable.

The soft-ripened cheese

Made of most varieties of milk, using a special kind of mould, but having almost nothing in common with the blue veins. Amazing, isn't it? Those are the brie, camembert, coulommiers, or brique (all French examples, because I'm writing what I know). This kind of cheese does not, usually, keep at all, as it is intended to be eaten in one sitting. Tastes range from mild and creamy (brie) to sharp and piquant (ripe camembert). Always with red wine, dry or semi-dry, never sweet.
Mostly eaten individually, just like the blue veins, but some salad and pasta recipes call for them.

'Hard' cheeses

Those are the ones that crumble rather than cut and go 'knock' when You tap them. Grana padano, parmiggiano, peccorino - Italy is the leader here, as this kind of cheese is intended to be grated and used as a condiment for pasta (sometimes roasted meat). Assembled in big molds and aged for years, sometimes, they can be undistinguishable from their thick wax crust, until tasted. There is no mistaking their taste, and I'm not going to attempt to describe it. They are expensive, but worth the price.
Can be eaten individually, but are at their best with pasta. Indispensable for more "modest" types of spaghetti sauce, like aglio e olio or puttanesca, where a lesser cheese will make a dissonance.

I can go on much longer like this, but feel obliged to stop now for the sake of my dear Readers. And for a bite of brie.

ΦΦΦ

* I don't need love,
For what good will love do me?
Cheddar never lies to me,
For when love's gone,
Cheeses last on...
;)

Preserving Aromatic Herbs

My basil plant developed a problem, and I'm not even so sure what it was, unfortunately. Not the red spider mites, and not other plant illnesses I know of. Anyway, I was forced to cut quite a few of the stems right off, and I didn't want to dry the healthy leaves out, because the whole point of keeping fresh basil is to have, you know, fresh basil.

Throwing the healthy leaves out was also not an option, of course, so I made pesto with some of them, but there were more than I needed for that, so I decided to preserve them in this really nifty way I know: by making frozen oil-cubes.

This is a really great way of preserving fresh, aromatic herbs for a long time without much complication. You just chop the herbs up, place them in portions in an ice cube tray, and pour oil over them. Take a moment to let the herbs soak up the oil, and put the tray in the freezer. When it freezes over, you've got yourself wonderful little capsules of fresh aroma for whenever you decide to unfreeze them, which gives you a way longer shelf life than a regular oil infusion would have. This is also a great way to make fancy ice cubes with herbs such as mint or lemonbalm.

Fresh herbs can also be frozen as they are, without the oil, but they will lose much more moisture and develop ice crystals on the surface. Which is not a problem when you plan on adding them to soups, but not so great when you want them in your pasta sauce. As with all cooking techniques, it's best to know them and choose between them when appropriate.

Some Thoughts on "Cleansing" and "Purifying"

I didn't really intend to post "random musings" here on Kitchen Witchcraft, but something happened that compelled me to post general observations instead of another recipe.
The described situation took place some time ago, but another, quite similar thing happened recently that reminded me of it, and I thought it worth sharing, in a way.

I was visiting a friend out of town, and there was a party going on, on which the conversation steered slowly towards witchcraft and the fact that I'm practising it. A lot of people were (as always) asking for love potions and hexes to be cast on their enemies, some were joking, some were only half-joking. I'm sure this is all too familiar to any "out" Witch.
However, as the party was breaking up, one of the people present approached me with a story concerning a friend, who has just moved to a new apartment and was experiencing some "spiritual troubles," as they put it. The symptoms included insomnia, inability to concentrate, violent mood swings and similar inconveniences. The person I was talking to was very concerned about their friend, and eventually persuaded me to come to their place and take a look at it, "maybe perform a purifying rite or at least advise." I've never really felt enough of an expert to offer consultation, but I reluctantly agreed.

As we made way to the place, I was given some additional information. The person experiencing troubles could not account for them in any way : they had no financial problems, nothing disastrous going on in their love-life, no health problems. Thinking that basic comfort  of living might have something to do with it, I asked whether the place they moved into was, perhaps, smaller than the previous one or otherwise a change for the worse. I was told it was a spacious apartment with a nice view. I don't mind admitting I was quite baffled. However, just stepping into the place gave me the answer, and it was such an obvious one that for a moment, I thought they were playing a joke on me.

You guessed it - the place was filthy. Dust, trash, dirty clothes, cigarette ash, dishes moulding in the sink, and as for the beautiful view, it was nigh-invisible through the greasy windows. And those people were wondering why the "spiritual" problems, expecting me to "work some herbs" for them.
Of course, I told them that the only herbs they need are the disinfectant ones, and the ritual they need to perform calls for rubber gloves, sponges, a mop and a lot of scrubbing. Not surprisingly, they were very disappointed, clearly thinking it was possible to wave a magic wand instead of house cleaning. It took a lot of time to convince them that no amount of incense is going to help in this particular situation.

What's interesting is that the person living in this mess was particularly uncooperative, claiming that they were keeping the place as they saw fit, and that they were comfortable in it.  They insisted that cleaning would actually detract from their comfort. I had to enumerate all of their "spiritual problems" back at them a couple of times to get the message across.

Why am I describing all this? Well, sometimes we expect magic to solve problems that really just need some work. I know I do. And sometimes we overlook the most obvious solutions (or causes), especially when they stem from self-indulgence. Sometimes we coat stupid behaviour with layers of excuses. What we don't realise is that ultimately, we end up hurting ourselves.
Oh, and sometimes, we don't keep our kitchen as clean as it should be, and this is a criminal offence if we are to cook anything good in it.

The Material Side

If we didn't have to eat, we would all be rich
- Jewish proverb

One of the most important matters to be taken into consideration, when preparing our meals, is the quality of the ingredients. Obviously, if we want our dishes to be wholesome and tasty, we cannot make them from bad materials.

On the other hand, some exotic herbs, high quality oils and especially cheeses,  can be difficult and expensive to obtain. The best, if a little generic, advice to be given here is to scout out the market, keep a sharp eye for sales and price reductions, and to experiment. Does it have to be bad because it's cheap? Not necessarily. The most important thing here is to check everything, because often an inexpensive ingredient will be a nice surprise, but only if it's fresh.

Here are some tips for the beginner foodstuff scout:

• Vegetables : always touch them to feel how hard (or soft) they are. Carrots, cucumbers and celery roots should be hard and dense, but peppers (capsicum) or tomatoes can be bought ripe and soft or young and tough, depending on Your preferences. Ripe will be more savoury, young will keep longer.
• Pasta and other grain derivatives : look closely at them. Is the spaghetti thin, light, semi-transparent? Is the rice mixed with other substances, are there any signs of insect presence? Don't buy it then. You can also check the country of origin : China is a good place for rice to come from, but not for cannelloni.
• Cheeses : cheese lore is a science all on its own. A lot like wine in that respect. If I were to give some basic advice, it would be to smell them : a good camembert should have a strong smell, even somewhat unpleasant. One that does not will very likely have no taste either.
• Oils : olive and grape seed oils are the ones that I use. Olive oil is one of the best things You can have in the kitchen, but it is quite expensive. If You are tempted by a sale, lift the bottle up to the light, see whether anything is swimming in the oil or are there any solid residues on the bottom since You don't want these. On the other hand, if the oil seems opaque or hazy, there is nothing to be worried about. It only means that it has spent some time in a low temperature and should revert to normal when it warms up.

After some time spent on "scouting", You will gather enough information to be able to shop for your favourite ingredients at reasonable prices. Exchange information with others, pay attention to the places where You got high quality foodstuffs. Do not hesitate to tell the vendors that You are satisfied by their products - this will let them know that they have chosen a good supplier.
As is the case with all knowledge, its accumulation will give You wisdom and increase Your skills.